Monday, February 23, 2009

Leaning

I am leaning.

I would rather be running, skipping, jumping, dancing, and singing in the rain, but at this moment in time I find myself resting on the only steadfast pillar in my life.

It is not that anything is wrong..........circumstances are aligned to my liking........for the most part......

There are a few things that I find myself wanting to bend and twist and tweak.........

My fingerprints will mar not mold..........I must wait for Him......for His breath to breathe inspiration and life into these things.........His signature will be fired into the clay, not mine.........

It is not that there is a present conflict or sorrow or shame to confront, it is that there is quiet. A stillness. A time of reflection.  A time of waiting for revelation. A time to consider the pain of others.....A time to look into the eyes of the One who knows me best.........and wait..........

Inactivity is not comfortable for me..........

Others ask, "What are you doing?"

"Listening........."

I have to be patient as they wonder about me..........

"I hear His heartbeat...........it is drawing me to a deeper place.........." I wanna say.........

I don't share the last part..........they aren't ready to hear about my journey to His heart.......so dressed in His grace I wait in the presence of God and wait for Him to whisper sweet nothings to me........His words are precious life to me..........they escort me through another day.......

"Who is this coming up from the wilderness, leaning on her beloved?" Song of Solomon 8:5

It is I! I am familiar with the wilderness. I have been there.........a few times.........

It is I who am leaning on this beloved One........

He is so patient.......

so sweet.........

charting my course.........

watching my footing...........

I will never leave His side.......

If He runs..............I will run.........

If He dances..........I will dance.........

If He feasts...........I will feast with Him..........

Because I have found my Beloved and my desire is for Him.........

Presently, He is my pillar.........my delight. My joy on which I lean.........






 

3 comments:

Paula (SweetPea) said...

This is beautiful, Cheri, as you are. There really is no better place for us than leaning...leaning on HIM. It's hard though. For you the quiet is hard. For me, the wildnerness is hard. The unknowning. The waiting. Yet, I gleamed a bit of joy this morn as I emailed my dad. I stated that after 20 months of my house on the market, I know He is in control and He has a grand plan for it not to sell in all this time. I felt a leap of joy to see that plan. Though, I am at peace with being in my house. 1) I dread a move 2) I hope beloved would return and we could sell and buy another home together instead of my purchasing something that I can merely afford alone...then him returned to "my" house instead of it feeling "his" house.

Not sure where all that came. Ugg.

I should just reply to your email.

I'm leaning with you, girl!

Leaning....
Paula

Joyful said...

Oh Cheri, this is a treasure.

Do you know this chorus:

"Learning to lean,
Learning to lean,
I'm learning to lean on Jesus.
Finding more pleasure
Than I'd ever dreamed
I'm learning to lean on Jesus".

Continue finding your pleasure and delight while leaning on Him.
Love ya,
Joy
PS. Still have that Starbucks card :o)

Laura said...

Awww, this is sweet, Cheri. Especially as we enter into Lent, this is where I want to be as well.

Love your heart!