Saturday, May 30, 2009


My PAST is blurring my vision
begging to influence my future, 
my now.......
It desires to hold hands,
forcing my attention,
distorting what was,
fabricating a new story.

Reality has
long been a vapor,
but the PAST desires to
renew it with skin.
From this viewpoint 
it appears real. 
It haunts me, promising me
if I only visit,
it will be kinder to me this time.

I glance behind,
tempted by its promises,
knowing that I will
be disappointed and 
will return empty handed

If only happy memories
would plead,
and demand my attention. 
They have settled and found
their rest in the corners of 
my mind. 

Times of pain, remorse, regret
keep returning,
without invitation,
tapping my shoulder, 
begging me to turn around 
and get lost somewhere 
back there in a distorted
used to be world.

I can't go back. I have become
a stranger there, 
I'm a new creature, and I know that 
it pulls with lies.

However, when it beckons,
I turn, glance behind, though
I no longer have
anything to offer it, 
and I am aware of
it's power to distract. 

I set my face toward new
beyond what used to be,
I gain new strength....
It empowers me.
Beginning with today,
a new yesterday is forming,
a fresh tomorrow is waiting
on the horizon.

My Savior appears, 
my rescuer.
He reminds my PAST of 
my freedom, demanding that
he loosen his grip.
My PAST releases my hand,
and slips away.

My vision is no longer blurred,
all is clear.....looking back cannot
harm me now....
My PAST has been redeemed by
the Savior of my soul.
His grace creates a barrier that 
insists my PAST be used for good. 

Face forward, I run into the future,
loosed from the weight
of what used to be, setting my sights
on what is to come.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Blogger Appreciation Week

I sent a card to a friend the other day. She has been going through a lot of stress for the last two or three years. It has been a hard stormy season in her life. Well, I am one that loves to find the perfect card for the moment. Rummaging through my card file I came across an old favorite. 

The card I picked had several different high-heeled shoes portrayed across the front. Inside it said, "Some days the only thing left to say is, 'What shoes go with this stress?'" 

I loved that card so much that I bought every one that the store had in the display pocket. I was shocked to find that the one that I sent to my friend the other day was the last of my stash. Do you know what that means? I have too many stressed out friends! Truth is, I debated whether or not to send it to her because I thought that I might need that card for myself someday! I took a chance and put it in the mail. Only a few hours later, when things began to get a bit stirred up, I was wondering if I should have held onto it a little while longer!  ; )

Like the thrill of being able to send that card with just the right message, so it is with being a citizen of bloggy world.

I love words! I love reading them, singing them, praying them, speaking them, and of course writing them. Blogging is a means for me to swirl some words around, mix in a bit of thought, prayer, and put it all out there in the wide open for all to see. Blogging is a way to stir my creative juices. Sometimes, when it is time to push the 'publish post' button,  I have the same feeling that I get right before I take off on a roller coaster ride. I say to myself, "Okay, here goes!" I push the button, then the ride begins! It really adds to the rush of the ride when the comments begin to come in.

The most wonderful part of bloggy world for me has been the fellowship. I have made some sweet, sweet friends who are also some my most faithful prayer partners. My heart has been softened by the ones who have been on their knees for me and those that I care about. I love to visit the blogs of others. I have gained much wisdom as they have opened their storehouses to me and generously shared their portion. 

I read a quote by C.S. Lewis the other day that I think sums it up well:

"Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too! I thought I was the only one!'" C. S. Lewis

This week one of my faithful, bloggy world friends, Daveda, is hosting a blogger appreciation week. She is the sweetest thing and so wise! You must stop by her blog (just click on her name above) and glean from the riches of her 'pen'. There you will have the opportunity to meet some other very special people who are joining our celebration this week. 

Daveda asked us to include a couple of our favorite posts from our past pages so here are a some of mine: Dad's Letter Jacket

Thank you so much for stopping in! You all come back now!


Tuesday, May 19, 2009


Friends, I have been challenged to write poetry.

Traditionally poetry was my forte, but raising children, managing a home, and
being a helpmate has whisked away my ambition. My poet's quill has long set in
it's vice becoming quite rusty. Yesterday it was brought to my attention and I felt
a gentle nudge from behind to once again find a blank page and paint words in
water color images. I chuckled at the thought of actually creating a poem that anyone
else might read, but this morning I had some words that refused to settle in my head
until they found their abode, brushed across a page. So here is my first attempt in, what seems a lifetime ago, to put words into small bits and pieces, forming something with a
few words while trying to say many things.

I am 
captured in a bubble
of unbelief
that masquerades itself as
my protection.

My hands caress  it's 
walls from the inside 
as I see beyond and imagine
what it would be like
to be
out there
where faith breathes.

How does one escape
this sphere of hopelessness,
shattering it's facade?

Memory recaptures a Word
a promise
a covenant...

Belief begins to rise 
like the fog that says
farewell to the morning

My heart responds 
with dancing.

The bubble cannot resist
it must unlock
this cell and
release me into
the world beyond 
it's embrace,
the embrace of an impostor.

The world of faith has
beckoned me

I am no longer held by the
limitations of the bubble
for I have been launched into
a new sphere...

the sphere of

"Everything is possible to him who believes." Mark 9:13


Monday, May 18, 2009

Sounds That Teach

It began with a sound like a man crying for help from a deep well. I looked at Scotty with a most puzzled look? "Who is in there?", I asked with my expression. His tummy was doing some warm up exercises that sounded like they were coming from an orchestra tune up. The sound was loud and I was pretty sure that everyone in our section had heard it. Did they think it was my tummy demanding their attention? If so, the look on my face revealed the truth! My expression pointed straight to him and pronounced him the guilty one.

A few minutes later it came. A roar that must have compared to the sound that the lions from Daniel's den made when the Lord let go of their mouths so that they could eat the bad guys. I am serious! It was so loud, my stomach sounded like it had a microphone next to it! And the sound just kept going on and on and on! I am pretty certain that everyone in our section and the one next to us heard it.

When it began I had this thought, "Oh no! Here we go! It is getting louder, building, building! Yep, it is completely out of control. I tried hard to appear like nothing was happening! I held my breath. I crossed my arms and held tight without trying to seem obvious, of course, but the sound rebelled against my efforts and only grew all the louder!

The *child sleeping on his mother's lap sitting two seats away from me was awakened by it. He pushed back from his mom, looked into her face, and with a loud whisper and look of surprise asked, "Mommy, what was THAT?" Well, our row began to shake, rattle, and roll with laughter, totally inspired by his reaction!

"That was Cheri's tummy, Nolan," his sweet momma replied.

To that the child turned his head with a classic expression, and stared right at me. You could see the wheels turning in that stare. I knew he was thinking, "How could your tummy make so much noise?"

By this time, the row I was sitting in was completely out of control. The trouble is, my eye scanned the rest of the congregation and we were the only ones laughing. The sermon was not funny. It was very sober. It was amazing! Good. Wonderful. But not funny this time. I began to pray that no one would ask what happened in our row.

Oh, you mother's of young ones, I know how it is when your children get the wiggles in church and just cannot seem to be quiet. I have had many young partners share my pew. Once they are grown and gone, just let me give you fair warning here, their noise will no longer be there to cover your rumbly tummy anymore. Please be thanking God that you have them with you now. Seriously, just them being with you can cover a multitude of things!

My lesson in church yesterday was on humility. It was a practicum, I got to learn while experiencing humiliation.

The momma sitting next to me offered me some crackers after the service. Oh, why did she wait? She prolonged her opportunity to feed the hungry!

My tummy is quiet today. It hasn't made a peep! Perhaps it is ashamed that it caused such a scene! Probably saving up it's voice for another quiet moment to express itself. It never seems to have the need to rumble unless there is a nice sized audience. It seems that it took it's final bow yesterday and knows the curtain is closed for now. I am anxious about it's next performance.

Well, friends, that is my story! I hope it made you smile!

*I am not positive that the child was sleeping. He was in the position and appeared to be. I told it as if he were for the sake of making the story better. And that is the truth! The rest of the story, I am afraid, is completely accurrate.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Golden Heart Award

I love surprises! This week I received a very special surprise from my friend Daveda from Grace Talk With Daveda. She nominated me for the Golden Heart Award. Oh my, I have never gotten such an award before! AHHHHHHHHHH! (That is me responding with excitement!)

She must have been intuitive or divinely inspired or something because I was contemplating my future as a writer. I read an article this week titled "Are You Really A Writer?". To tell you the truth, it had a stirring affect on me. Ummmm? Then it shook me up..... A LOT!  I thought about it, prayed about it, and then sat down at my computer and began to write. My conclusion, just keep after it because, how to say, I feel I must!

 I appreciate my bloggy friends because they read my posts with a "mother's eye" rather than that of an inspector. As they read, they sprinkle my words with grace. Intuitively they perceive my intentions and are so encouraging! They read between and beyond the lines! (Friends, I am not really prompting critiquing here. That scares me to death!) My stay in bloggy world has been such a delightful experience. My heart is tied to those I follow as well as to those who are following me. It is an enlightening fellowship.

What an interesting way to minister, putting thoughts and prayers on a page expecting to lift another's load. My desire is that it will be refreshing for those that peruse my page. Oh, to be able to create a smile, inspire agreement in prayer, equip a saint for her next step, exhort, motivate, and bless. Blogging is a creative way to leave that kind of wake behind us. It kind of like having 'Goodness and Mercy follow us all of our days'.

Now I get to pass along this award to five others that are part of my bloggy world. It is a privilege to encourage them. I hope that you will visit them and leave them a comment. Say hello and make a new friend! These are the friends that I have chosen.

1. Ashli from "Vagrant"~ is my beautiful daughter. She is an amazing writer with deep insights that are sure to amaze you. I hope to write as well as she does someday. I love everything she writes, but the pieces that have a reflection on our home really melt my heart!
2. Laura from "The Wellblog" who ministers rich truths in art form. Have you heard of Max Lucado? Laura has like talent with the female touch. Her "pen" is her paintbrush. 
3. Joy from "Ponderings"  ~is a wise and gifted writer that will bless you beyond words. She aims her wisdom straight to the heart of the matter and hits the bulls-eye every time. You will love Joy. She is a very special friend of mine! EnJoy!
4. Kandace from "The Mantle"~is the newest on my roster of bloggy friends, and is one of my longtime buddies in real life. Our relationship began long before I knew how to send an e-mail much less post a blog. She testifies of the amazing hand of the Lord in her life. Expect to find His fingerprints all over her testimonies!
5. And "Melissa" ~one of my coaches from Proverbs 31 Ministries. Melissa ministers in such a warm, genuine, and simply beautiful way. I have been walking with her through this bloggy sphere for some time. She has been such a blessing to my life. Prepare to meet a sweetheart and find a new friend! 

Just click on the links in red to meet some precious women  that the Lord has used to inspire me. It has been such a pleasure to introduce you to them in this very special way. 

If you receive this award and decide to accept, it's your turn now. You get to choose 5 blogging friends that you would like to pass the "Golden Heart Award" along to. Post this in a blog and make sure you add the heart photo in it. Then, notify those you have selected that you have nominated them. Ask your readers to check out their sites, leave a comment, and if they like what they read, they become a follower!

Thank you for the sweet surprise, Daveda! You made my day!

Because He Lives!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009


At first I didn't think he even noticed me. He had his eye set on getting to the new red geranium at my back door. I wish that my camera had been hanging around my neck but once again I was unprepared for the wonder that the Lord was going to present before me today. The little green hummingbird remained inches from my face as if insisting that I thoroughly examine him as he hung in space and tasted the nectar of the crimson blooms. 

I was awestruck at his presence. We don't have these little creatures around our house very often. It seemed that his little green body with wings at full speed,  had just been released from the hand of the Master, so that my attention should be roused and my awe of Him restored. 

The timing was impeccable. I had just returned home after many errands and he arrived at the same exact moment. 

I really believe that little wonder of God had a message for me. He was redirecting my sights. He spoke without words. 

Once again my heart felt it's redemption. 

Wonder replaced worry.

My little friend has not returned. My eye will be more attentive now. Expectations are stirred with hope that he will. He might be one of those amazing acquaintances of life that are so brief that they are barely there at all. They seem like a phantom, or perhaps a vision, or dream, however the imprint they leave behind remains with us long after their departure. 

 The Lord did this for me. Today, He blew me a kiss from the palm of his hand and it came to me in the form of a humming bird. 

So I returned the gesture as best I could ,with gratitude, for His compassions are great. His love is generous. His Spirit is kind. And because of who He is, my heart is completely filled with awe.

Monday, May 11, 2009

In The Wake of Mother's Day

Does anyone else have a hard time with Mother's Day or is it just me? I fail to understand why I am so emotional about this day. I seriously cannot figure myself out. Perhaps every year I am at that emotional time of the month and that is why tears are ready to spill at any given second. For the last several years this has had to be one of my least favorite days! I dread it. I endure it. I always look forward to getting beyond it.

Maybe it is because I have to do the cooking for everyone. I usually work very hard on Saturdays and prepare a wonderful meal. Ugggh!!! This year my mom and mother-in-law pitched in some. That didn't even make me feel better though I surely did eat better.

I usually enjoy making a meal, but I don't like my attitude at all when I make it for Mother's Day. I tried so hard to get myself in a better frame of mind about it. To no avail!

Saturday my husband was in a very good mood........he was even a little frisky.....uggghhhh!!! And all I could think was I have soooo much to do to prepare for Mother's Day! And so, I know, I am feeling very sorry for myself!

I walked in from one of my errands on Saturday to find my husband lounging on the couch watching Grumpy Old Men! I was immediately grumpier inside and some of my grumpiness began to erupt. I thought to myself, "Grumpiness entertains him, well I can do that!"

He looked happy to see me, and he got all smoozy and such and wondered what I was doing. I did not handle his inquiry well. "I have to cook!!!!!"

My first regret was that I had to go to Wal-Mart before I could cook! The day before Mother's Day. The day of prom. The week before graduation!!!! I don't like to go to Wal-Mart when there are people there much less a crowd that would consist of most of Neosho and surrounding counties. I was in such a bad state of mind.

I began to think that Mother's Day could be difficult for moms in various situations. Perhaps there is a mom with a son or daughter overseas in the military, on the mission field, or perhaps in school. Perhaps you have a mom that is in heaven now and you miss her on this day.

One reason that I think I struggle is this is one of the times that my dad would alway get with me to find something special for my mom. He got sick about four years ago this time of year and died on Memorial Day of that same year......Yeah Memorial Day is really rough for me too!

I remember my first Mother's Day I was pregnant with  Josh. Scotty gave me my very first Mother's Day card. I hadn't even thought of receiving anything on Mother's Day since this was my first experience at being one. He has been faithful to get me a card every year since, that is until last year and this. I guess I am terribly spoiled because I miss this simple gesture of thoughtfulness. 

Scotty is so good at finding the best card in the world! Even if he waits until the morning of a holiday to buy me a card it is always the most amazing card ever! I seriously do not know how he does it. Perhaps it is because he is such a mercy person that this is one of the ways that the Lord returns mercy to him, by hiding the perfect card back until he walks into the store and then the Lord supernaturally moves it into plain sight.  

Well, he didn't even make the effort this year so I am wondering who got the card that was supposed to come to me! Oh, I know, I am in desperate need of a good talking to. I am not sounding like a Proverbs 31 Woman. I am so sorry. I don't understand myself at all. I cry at church on Mother's Day every year. A couple of years I just had to leave because it was too hard. 

Well, as the day was on it's way out it got better. Lunch was delightful. Josh, Luke, and Josiah were here. My mom and Scotty's mom and dad were here and I thoroughly enjoyed everyone. Scotty was so sweet and loving  and simply wonderful! 

I talked to a dear friend of mine today and she had a very difficult Mother's Day for different reasons. She is in Missouri, her sons are far away and she was completely alone on Mother's Day. 

But the Lord is so good, because we are never really alone. 

I did get a card on Mother's Day. It was from my mother. 

And that is why we celebrate our mothers, because of all the people we know and love, they are the ones who will always remember us.

My love to you friends. 

If  you happen to be a mother, I hope you had the most amazing Mother's Day ever!!!!!


Monday, May 4, 2009

Wounded Lamb

The service had begun. Everyone's head was bowed in an attitude of prayer. My eyes were open, searching, for what I really wasn't sure. I love to let my eyes wander across the sea of people. His people. Everyone standing like statues, some sincere, some remembering a forgotten item on their grocery list. 

It was in that moment that I spotted him, that moment of quiet. He could not be still. Something was shattered inside of him and he could not let this silence calm him. He was a broken one. Rejected. Hurting.

I wanted to walk right over to him and fix him. He was a foster child, sharing a home with another family that was not his own. He had been passed around like the offering plate. Very little had been dropped in when he passed by. 

When I spotted him he was twisting and turning and talking to himself. He wasn't trying to be a bother to anyone else, he just needed to keep going. That was it. He had to keep going or he might not be able to go on. 

Tears filled my eyes and began to roll down my cheeks. In that moment of prayer I spotted a lonely heart and intercession began to pour out of me like a river. I had met this young one before, but I had been oblivious to it. I don't know how I missed it,  he wore rejection like a garment. A weight came over me, a heaviness too big to carry, a regret that didn't belong to me. Suddenly I was wrapped in this little man's need. 

That glimpse became revelation of this little guy's heart. In that one moment I picked up a lamb to lead to the Shepherd. Physically he remained standing in his place, but spiritually he was in my arms and we were on the way to the Father. And for all the weight of him, he was not heavy. My want to take him there would provide the strength I needed to get him there.

That was the beginning of a journey. It has been over a year now and every time that young one comes to mind, I extend my arms to the Father and say, "Your lamb, Father, heal your wounded lamb." 

The little guy doesn't know that when I see him sitting clear across the church and it is time to greet others, that I walk all the way to where he is so that I can encourage him. He shakes my hand and walks on to greet the one next to me.  He doesn't know that the Father and I are talking about him. He doesn't know how much I am on his side and I don't know if he ever will. That is how intercession is, carrying in secret the burden of others to the One who can help. 

The Lord has a plan for the little man in this story. I am believing that the end of his life will be better than the beginning. I am believing that the Lord is going to create a family circle around him, one that is so strong it will never be broken.  I am believing for the kind of family ties that bind everyone together in such a way that when one passes on they remain in the other's hearts forever. 

And we will be his church family, loving him, teaching him, ministering to him, and believing for him. I believe we are going to witness a restoration, and the broken little man who was will only be a memory to the complete man that he is sure to become. 

Because He Lives!

Saturday, May 2, 2009


My son and I are heavily engaged in a computer background war. I put a beautiful scenic, meaningful, complete with verse background on the computer, and sometime during his midnight snack he invariably changes it. My seventeen year old male child is working at getting a rise out of his middle-aged momma. 

One morning I woke to the welcome portrait of a shark with mouth wide open and ready to bite me. The photo was so up-close I wondered if the photographer still owned the camera, or his hand still belonged to him for that matter, or if were they now objects of shark flesh, (or you know, whatever shark food turns into). Of course he might have had a great zoom.

Yesterday I woke to the outline graphic of a hand raised and ready for a high-five. 

Whatever I find on my computer background causes me to smile. 

I hope that when I post my thought provoking, meaningful, beautiful, purposeful backgrounds it makes Josiah ponder. Or does it only stimulate an intense desire to outdo me.

This morning I found a warning posted on my background:

Swine Influenza A (H1N1) Was Recently
              Detected In This Area
             Wash Your Hands Often. 
                   Wear Face Mask.
                       Remain Calm.

Ironically I was just reading in our local paper an article about the Influenza Epidemic of 1918. It reported the outbreak of 1918 killed more people that the Bubonic Plague. 

While I don't find this humorous, just interesting, it did bring a word to my mind. 


Have you ever heard a child giggle, and did it stir a giggle out of you?

Encountered a stranger, submerged deep in thought, you smile, so they lay their thoughts to the side for a brief respite, returning a beautiful smile to you.

Have you ever read an amazing work of fiction and been inspired to take up the pen yourself?

Have you ever listened to a man of God, teach from his heart with a sound  in his voice that makes you want to know more about God?

Or have you eaten the delicacies of a great cook and wanted their recipes and their passion for cooking?

Perhaps you know a godly woman who sits in the presence of God so much that her countenance bears the fact that she has been with Him, and being around her makes you want to pray more.

Do you know anyone with real joy? Joy that is full to overflowing, could never be contained, and is just plain infectious? 

Or witnessed peace in someone, unexplainable peace, when circumstances are so hard that there should only be terror?

Infectious..........(according to the Merriam Webster Dictionary) "spreading or capable of spreading rapidly to others.....Example: "Their enthusiasm was infectious."

Have you ever been impacted by the fire of another's enthusiasm?

Or someone's faith?

I have and so I hope and pray and desire to be infectious for good to someone. Perhaps what I leave on my computer background tonight will have an infectious impact on my seventeen year old. I am thinking it will take more than that, so for his sake I am praying to be infectious so that he he might be infectious, and the truth of the gospel will spread to epidemic proportions. 

I don't think epidemic is a positive word but I think you know what I mean.

I wish I could make a background on my computer that reads (of course it would be beautiful)

Warning: the family that lives in the house on the corner, made of red brick  with a porch that faces west, welcomes you. During your stay, we hope you catch something!

Blessings, friends!